I started recovering from anorexia in 2017. It was a grueling process, and one of the biggest lessons I had to learn was how to self-care. I’d spent years working myself into the ground because I thought punishment and sacrifice were necessary for success, but I’ve since learned that true success can only come from balance, consistency, and letting your inner child thrive.
It turns out living a fruitful life has nothing to do with work. Still, most of us have to do it if we want to live comfortably in modern society. And while this can feel like a prison, I’ve found that no matter the parameters of the world you live in, you always have the power to mold your function in a way that feels beautiful. In a world where working is necessary for survival, you can make it your mission to pursue something you love and thoroughly enjoy.
If that enjoyable thing for you is writing, you’ve come to the right place. I’ve got some top tips when it comes to succeeding as a writer in a way that is balanced, sustainable, and allows you to play along the way.
The biggest misconception about writing
As a young writer, I was taken by the idea that if I wanted to write really compelling pieces, I’d have to suffer. From Sylvia Plath and Virginia Woolf to Ernest Hemingway and Edgar Allen Poe, we have so many examples of lauded writers who’ve found success by turning their misery into art.
Mistaking this commonality among well-known writers as some sort of prerequisite, I believed that if I wanted to be great, I’d have to go through a certain amount of darkness—but if an array of perspectives are essential for empathy, why couldn’t I be a source of positivity among the misery? Optimism is my default, and I’ve finally learned to embrace that instead of attempting to eschew it in favor of what I thought a writer was supposed to sound like.
Don’t get me wrong—I’ve gone through my fair share of darkness, and those experiences inspired me to come up with some haunting pieces, but none of it ever really felt like me. Eventually, I realized that putting my mental health at risk for the art of it all wasn’t right. I’m able to create much more beautiful and authentic pieces when I treat myself with love and care.
9 tips that have helped me achieve self-care as a writer
It’s taken me years to understand what this means for me, so I encourage you to be patient with yourself if you’re just starting on the same journey as a writer.
Don’t be afraid to get in touch with your inner child. Let that little person play, because they were your first creator who was intrinsically bursting forth with imagination and inspiration. They never wanted the darkness; they were instinctively drawn toward the light, even if they never got the chance to bask in it.
Establish a healthy routine.
The first step to success in any industry is understanding your own ebbs and flows and being compassionate toward them.
For example: while I’m a morning person, years of experience have taught me that checking my email as soon as I open my eyes is a recipe for instant stress that follows me throughout the day.
To combat this while still getting a bright and early start to creation, I begin each day with hot lemon and ginger water, positive affirmations, and a stretching and exercise routine. These practices allow me to get in touch with my body and soul before I activate my mind; it’s a great way for me to feel like I’m easing into things while taking good care of my spirit.
After 30 minutes to one hour of this (depending on the day and how much time I have), I brew a coffee or matcha latte and get started on answering emails or attending meetings. I try to slot all of my meetings into the morning so I can dedicate the rest of my day to writing, planning, and/or strategizing.
I make sure to have snacks throughout the day and meals prepped if I can, because I like to eat a lot! I also listen to my body and energy levels and if I’m experiencing writer’s block or didn’t get a great night of sleep, I make sure to honor that and adjust my plans accordingly. The idea is to establish a routine while still remaining flexible, and always committing to a hard stop when the day is done.
Set boundaries—especially if you work from home.
Speaking of hard stops: another non-negotiable for succeeding in the writing industry is setting firm boundaries with yourself and your work. This can be difficult if you work from home, especially if your desk is in your bedroom or otherwise closely linked to your personal space.
If you can, keep your work space in a different room entirely. If your space doesn’t permit this, I recommend getting something to cover that area up when you’re done for the day, like a wood panel screen or room divider. Out of sight, out of mind. You should also turn off your email and/or phone notifications after your predetermined quitting time and commit to NOT responding to anything work-related once you’re signed off for the day.
No matter how tempting it may be to reply after hours, refuse to break your own boundaries out of fear. I’ve done this many times throughout the years, and it’s the quickest way to mess up and/or burn out. Don’t be afraid to say no.
Keep a journal.
Not only is journaling great for mental health and personal reflection—it’s also helpful for writer’s block. Get a paper and pen and let your mind flow. As random as whatever comes out may be, this practice often inspires a much-needed fresh perspective, and you’re able to push through the block as a result.
Write outside of your comfort zone.
Don’t be afraid to tackle genres and/or topics outside of your area of expertise, especially if you’re just starting out. Writing about a wide variety of random topics is a great way to continue learning and educating yourself—all while getting paid to do so.
Stay optimistic and open-minded, and seek out connections in every new topic you take on. You’d be surprised how these seemingly random pursuits inspire what you consider to be your strong suit.
Practice mindfulness.
As writers, we have to spend a lot of time in our heads either pondering the past or thinking about the future. While necessary to craft thoughtful pieces, this practice can fuel a lot of anxiety and/or depression if you’re not careful, and that’s why it’s so important to know how to separate yourself from your work.
Take frequent breaks to be in the present and soak in your surroundings, whether that be through meditation, yoga, a quick stretch, or running through the five senses exercise.
Move your body.
Speaking of exercise, another important thing to work into your writerly routine is to move that body! Writing is extremely sedentary—the new smoking, if you haven’t heard.
Go for a walk. If you’re too busy, try a standing desk or take a five-minute break to stretch.
But…devils’ advocate: If you’re too busy to walk, take some work on the go. A lot of the writing process involves research, and if that’s the case for you, you can easily pop a podcast or book-on-tape into your ear and listen while you move. You can also talk-to-text some notes or reflections on what you’re working on, or just take in your surroundings and use them to get inspired when you’re back at your desk.
Stay connected to community.
Writing is very isolating, and your mind can become a dark place if you aren’t careful. I’ve isolated myself a lot throughout my writing career, and it resulted in waves of anxiety and depression I’ve had to work my way out of over time.
Combat this by staying connected to community, whether that be other writers or family and friends you enjoy talking to. If you’re not convinced to do this for the sake of health, think about it this way: you can use these interactions to get inspired with your work. Treat everything as an opportunity to hone your craft, and you will.
Embrace other creative outlets.
No matter your area of writing expertise, you first got into this profession because you like to create! So…what else you got?
If you’re hit with writer’s block, shake things up by getting creative in other ways. This might be painting, making music, choreographing a dance, sculpting, knitting…whatever gets you out of your head and back into that creative energy.
Celebrate your achievements.
When’s the last time you celebrated your wins? I’m constantly having to remind myself to do so, but it’s so important to take the time to look back on how far you’ve come.
Put time in your schedule to celebrate yourself once a week, NO EXCEPTIONS. This doesn’t have to be a huge thing—you can take yourself out for a special lunch or coffee, catch up with a friend, or watch an episode of your favorite TV show.
Whatever you decide on, make sure to consciously say to yourself, “I am celebrating myself right now.” Then, take a few minutes to open your journal and write down your recent wins. I do this once a week on Fridays. It takes me less than a minute, and at the end of the year, I have 52 weeks worth of gratitude to reflect on and cherish.
It’s taken me years to understand how important self-care is, so don’t be hard on yourself if it feels like a struggle to shift your mindset. If you’re looking for more tips, feel free to reach out to me at taylorfengle@gmail.com—and if you self-care in a way that I haven’t listed, leave a comment below.
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